LiveSide - News blog

Greed! Just plain old everyday greed!

Yahoo says NO? Well Not Really!

Yahoo's board of directors has formally rejected my overtures to take over their sinking ship just as I thought they would! The journalist are making this into a big deal, but it's really not, it's called NEGOTIATION people! I understand that it's negotiating on a level waaaaay above anything you people have ever experienced so I will try to put it in terms that you all can understand.

I'll use a parable:

When I was in my freshman year I became infatuated whith a hot little number named Yolanda (dang she was fine).

All of my friends kept saying, "Steve, she is out of your league!" I would reply, "waddayah mean?" They would answer, "she's beautiful and smart". But, did I listen to them? Well, yes. Until one day, she came up to me and said, "Hi Steve, I'm Yolanda, my brother's friend Bill says that you like me and would probablly be willing to do all of my accounting assignments for me."

I replied in a masculine tone "why, sure Yolanda, but it'll cost you a date." She sighed, stared, rolled her eyes and said, "tonight, 8 PM, behind the bleecchers!" She then handed me a huge wad of papers," have all of these done when you come, toad!"

As she turned and marched away, I yelled (loud enough for all of my friends to hear), "It's a date baby! I'll bring a blanket!" (I always had a way of speaking to the ladies that just made them go wild)

I ran back to the dorm, skipped two classes, it took a lot of crunching but I finished all of the test, reports and assignments for her by 7:45, I boxed it all up, grabbed my Farrah Blanket, ran across campus and made it under the bleechers at exactly 8:01 PM.

She said, "You are late! Gimme the papers!" I gave her the box, then I spread the Farrah Blanket out. She threw me two pair of handcuffs and said sweetly, "Get down on your hands and knees, cuff your wrist and ankles, lay down on the blanket, eyes closed!" I complied and said, "Kinkyyyyy!" She then said in a very sexy tone, "I'll be right back sweetie."

I stayed there, eyes close, waiting for about two hours before I realised she tricked me!

I knew though that she would be coming back, because in my rush to get there I brought her a shoebox containing my old converse high tops! ew!

Yahoo will be back too.